Thursday, March 29, 2007

of being bang and undeniably in the middle of life!

called up N yesterday. She sounded distracted so i asked 'are you in the middle of something?'She laughed and said" not really, only in the middle of life..." ( or something to that effect)

it was the most beautiful/profound/poignant line i have heard in a long while. to give a context to the line- she is the mother of an adorable 16 month old girl.

i really think this is the zone where new parents and the rest of the world get divided. why do we all -stay at home moms, corporate job moms, working at home moms, whatever moms with or without help- sound distracted/preoccupied/obsessive/smitten/gloating/complaining?

Every conversation of mine that slips into sanah mode abruptly ends with 'oh you are so obsessive/preoccupied/etcetcetc'. you get the drift. So i stop myself from getting into sanah mode. No one seems to mind my film mode. Its pretty much the same set of things- obsessiveness/ complaining/whining/being smitten/ gloating etcetcetc...

I am a talkative person( stop nodding so vigorously all ye who know me!). I go on about everything i am involved in - being in love/ heartbreaks/projects/the dream i had the previous night/films/books...I unabashedly go on and on and on.

This is possibly the first time i have become conscious of my going on and on. Bloody hell i had to resort to a blog to go on and on about my life as a mom with sanah.

3 comments:

The Mad Momma said...

hmm... i dont know... why not go on and on abt your child? why is it such a bad thing. each one of us wants to do it... each one of us resists the urge... why?

its such a special thing.. being in the middle of life and watching a little life take shape right before your eyes. as a society we're too busy being apologetic for the most natural things....

surabhi said...

yeah when i feel somewhat apologetic is when i blabber on even more. some peverse defiance. what annoys me is that i am not being my natural self.so i come away feeling mildly bruised for not being myself

Mukul said...

let me guess who N is..