the bby mommy bloggers met!
five of us and our progeny. from four months to four years, they came in all shapes and sizes. and it was minutes before we were smitten with the bunch. the two little babies remained angelic, the occasional feed and the naps, not one wail...
and the two boys led sanah into the play room even while i was saying hello at the door. i was floored by the gallant young things, one dressed in a super cool jacket and the other the perfect host, unpeturbed that new kids were taking over his toys and his room.
and the mommas, we all found common links.
Y turned out to be a student of george! she gasped, and the worried me asked george after i got back if he had pissed off this set of students in any way...imagine a mommy pal who might have formed a 'hate this prof'- who happens to be my husband- club! and parul works with a dear family friend.
and then ofcourse the invariable questions about the other's magic formula in juggling the dozen balls...and all seem to be keeping the balls up in the air perfectly...
i remain astounded at the ease with which people pass judgements about mothers -oh she works, oh she quit working...she is so hyper...and that one doesnt care ... oh she leaves the kids with the maids, and that one with her mom, and that one wont leave without her kid...i hear it all the time around me.
not even in our early twenties did we so freely pass judgments about each other- the time that were all muddling, struggling through our choices- i do not remember anyone saying- oh she can not hold onto her relationships, and she cant get over that one relationship...oh he is commitment phobic because he does not believe in marriage..and he opted out of the marriage racket because he found no one... all i seem to remember is a deep acceptance and respect for the choices we all made...and even when the other was going through hell all we tried to do was support, not say oh your choice of men really sucks...and you go for crazy women...why cant you deide what work you want to do...etc etc...
so many friends chose difficult paths and stayed true to what they believed would bring happiness. and we look on with pride at the host of difficult choices so many have made.
and yet i feel that when friends become mothers the acceptance seems to crumble...how could she go back to work leaving her baby after six months- dammit its important to her, and she remains as connected to her child as the next person who remains attached to her child through the day....and how could she give up working just because she has become a mother, think hard and you might come up with the answer yourself, try it...
oh that long deviating rant was to come back to why it was comforting to meet up with a bunch of mammas who are so obsessed with being mothers that we actually...gasp...gasp...blog about it, openly, for all to see... and each of us have found our own secret magic formulas to make our choices....constantly seeking information and advice to keep honing the formula, but the formula remains unique...might not always be successful either...but works most of the times.
and all five mothers had made very different choices... and that is whats so nice.
so we all met at rohini's place- only a brave lady invites four mothers with children to her spotless home. and brave lady and perfect host she was.
and santa claus kiran brought gifts for the kids.
loads of food was wolfed down.
the classic group photos were taken.
no, it did not seem like a first meeting...